You talk like Hilda Ogden and you dance like Danny La Rue Your clothes all fit you like sacks and you wear a large size ten shoe..yes you do You live in a small bedsit apartment near an abattoir that doesn't half stink.. and you only own one record and that's the Scaffolds Lily the Pink You go to anyone's parties under bridges where they are all tight .and you sip your plonk and your cider and smoke cannabis all through the night yes you do I've seen all your qualifications..you got five A's for nicking from stores you are a legend in this small city even the local constabulary have a cell that is all yours... yes they do. . I know where you're going to tonight.. when you cant crawl back to your bed. I know the place very well because it is my garden shed but it's dry and warm yes it is.. You are twenty going on fifty.. these days it is hard to say it's the lifestyle you are leading my lovely.. drinking all night and sleeping all day... you know it is You once were my one and only...and we always had so much fun.. we did everything together. we were a couple right from day one... but that day you went to a mad party you started to drift away.. all I can do now.. is watch over you and hope you come back to me one day yes I do.. I do I love you........