I asked Jack and also Jill to go and get me some water they legged it up a very steep hill but didn't come down like they oughta Jack rolled down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after I stood at the bottom of the hill and wet myself with laughter Humpty Dumpty was very shy just to look and you could tell but when he saw them tumbling down he came right out of his shell This little piggy on his way to the market didn't like what he could see so he turned around and ran back home all the way crying 'wee wee wee' Red Riding Hood was passing by when Jack let out a wail Jill thought Red was trying it on and whacked her with her pail I never did get my awaited drink of cool refreshing water but the upside is I married Jill who gave me a beautiful daughter Is Jack OK I hear you say? don't worry on that score he started drinking a bottle of vinegar each day but now its more and more On the top of the hill he sits all day drinking and smoking a vapour then when he is done having his fun he flakes out on a bed of brown paper